Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Hello to whoever may reading this,

Finally,I have finish my 3rd semester.How's my final exam?I guess better I dont talk about this matter.My exam has been given me nightmare!This past 3 weeks i feel like my head is going to blow up and it become bigger each day until the last day of exam,I lay down in front of the exam and "phewhh" out loud. My friend was like "alyaa pengsan ke?" with this shock expression and I was like "am I being overreact?".

Well,it's been awhile since stalk my homeslice blog.I just read lola's blog and her latest post is about her boyfriend. As I go through, I realise that her boyfriend is like a clone of my boyfriend. Every little things she said about him is like she talking about my boyfriend.Being emotional over some small matter,raise his voice when he is angry and the most important thing is being a CONTROL FREAK!.

To lola,
Babe aku harap engkau kuatkan semangat and biarla apa dia orang nak cakap pasal engkau.
One day, people will know the truth. Kalaula aku boleh jumpa dia, aku rasa nak sekeh-sekeh dia sebab buat engkau macam tu.Aku faham apa yang engkau rasa sebab boyfriend aku macam dia juga.Tapi aku tak berani nak minta break up dengan dia sebab tak sampai hati.Kalau ikutkan, banyak benda yang aku regret lepas kenal dia.But it's too late.So, sebelum terlambat engkau decide betul-betul whether you still want to be with him or not.Jangan sebab engkau rasa terhutang budi dengan dia, engkau tak nak break off with him sebab nanti ia akan memakan diri sendiri.

About him :

My boyfriend and i met when we were working together.He kept telling me he like.If you tell them, to an eighteen yeral orld girl who never been in a serious relationship before,she will believe you and think that you really fall for her.He was being so nice to me and slowly make me fall for him.So, one day he call me asking me whether I love him or not,and I reply I love him.If I knew it would turn out like this I would've say NO!. I dont feel regret that we are a couple now but i feel regret that you break your promise.The first few month of our relationship,you promise me many things and I believe you.Thinking that you wouldn't break the promise you made.But boys will always be boys.

When we go out,I dont feel happy.You act like nothing and kept asking me "why am I acting like this?".I never do anything fun with you.We never go roller skate together, go to see the light in i-city,having a nice dinner together,go shopping together.All we do is just sit one place and talk about YOU AND YOU!.I know you dont have anyone here but can you listen to my story too.

When we discussing about some matter, you always want to win.You say,tell me how I think but at the end it is you opinion is matter. What I think,you dont care.When I rebel,you angry. Say that I never listen to you bla..bla..bla.Even my parent listen to what i say but you never.

You know that our love is not the same like other couple.Our religion,race,nationality is totally different. When you are in trouble, me and my mom will help you. I never ask you to pay us back,i just want you to treat me well.

When I go out, keep asking what time I'm going to come back and you sound like you dont like that I'm going out. Though I'm going out with my parent, you still dont like.
You cant expect me to sit at home and knitting.I cant be like that.In your country, maybe yes but not here. You cannot disturb my privacy.I also never disturb your privacy.Where you want to go, what you want to do, I allow you as long you dont play me.

I still remember,i just come back from medan and I'm not feeling well. I got jet leg and i'm so tired. When I've arrive LCCT, you angry at me because I late to send you message. Before,I go on a plane I text you, telling you that I'll be arriving LCCT around 11. When I've arrive it's already 11.05 something and I cant straing away switch on my phone bacuse there's some matter I need to settle like immigration check,my luggage and so on.Around 11.30 I message you.You reply me but you sound so sad.I call you and you started to angry.I'm confuse! What is wrong with you?I cant figure it out.When I'm having my dinner,you call me.Keep on talking in angry manner and not trying to understand my condition.*sigh*.My parent start to become annoyed because I cant eat my dinner nicely because i too busy listening to you "complaining"

A few months back,you say something that really hurt me. Before this you promise you will try your best to make it but then after 1 year you break the promise you made.
I guess when we marry,you will break and forget all the promise you made to me.You were crying and angry and say that I never listen to you.At the end, I just agree to what you say.Deep in my heart I really want to cry and yell at you but I control myself because I know you always want to win.When I let you win,you happy.
While in train going back to my hostel, you say that I look older than you, you were handsome bla..bla..bla complementing yourself. After our argument, you say like that.How am I suppose to feel?I'm faking my laugh,smile and agree to all the things you say about yourself.
When I've arrive my hostel, I really cant control myself. So,I let it all out to my room mate.
She almost burst to tears when I tell her about what happen.

I remember when we fight, you tell me that I'm a gold digger.You call me many-many times until your credits finish,then you go to top up and call me again and again.When I pick up you say "alyaa dont put down the phone. I've got a lot of money.I will use all my money to call you".
Not just that, there's one day when you didnt message nor call me. The next day,when I send you this "what are we now?whatever your decision I will agree".Only then you call me.I guess you scared.Actually, my friends tell me to break with you but i dont have the guts to tell you that. I believe you will change but until now nothing's change.Just the same old you.The only thing that change is your promise to me.


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